You dont understand. I needed her to tell me to go fuck myself. I needed this to be over, so I could get on. She sounds at least somewhat interested. Now I essentially have to try, or shes gonna wonder why I didn't, which is either gonna make her think our mutual friend lied to her, which will hurt their relationship, or that I think I decided something was wrong with her, which will hurt her self esteem. I am stuck making an effort now, which I will find a new and interesting way to fuck up. This is the worst day of my life.
a christian is also very compassionate, tolerant and understanding, thats if shes a true one, she already knows people are liable to stuff up hence why a christian is taught to be long suffering, one of the bible qualities of love, gees ive put up with the net a long bloody time
to me it looks like she likes you, so now you have to either pursue your interest in her, or blow her away, your lucky shes a christian, she has patience and understanding and all the good qualities on her side instructed in fear of breaking the rules of not loving thy neighbor or God properly
you need someone to talk to and trust, and you need laughter and love in your life, you need someone who gives a shit about you or else you would not come here and post your daily issues like you have over the years, hoping someone would respond and give a f@#$, well you found some people do care and some dont in fact you have copped crap on here yet you still come back, why? because your missing something? what ? amusement, company and most of the time love in its various forms whether it be a compliment or a listening ear or an agreement that someone sees eye to eye, and thats what your knocking back now, your foolish if not stupid, people go on the net because they dont realize they are needing entertainment and are bored, or lonely or are not busy enough in their daily lives, on rare occasion to keep in contact with their mates
certainly if i were to find a partner i would f!@# the net off and only be on it to say hi to my family and only a handful of friends, because i would have a world out there id rather discover, going to a party beats coming on the net, so does having dinner with the family which is what your considering forfeiting
so f@$% it up if shes christian she will understand, your no angel with destructive powers that have to answer to God for your sins are you ? so she will understand if she cares, so long as you explain yourself and have good communication, even when you get to know her better, tell her your scared of screwing up and your most talented at it but be serious when you tell her that or she may laugh thinking your being funny
